8 Secrets of Effective Communication:

8 Secrets of Effective Communication
8 Secrets of Effective Communication

The importance of Effective Communication skills:

Tima Mir

In my opinion, Effective Communication is everything.

I learned a lot from my relationships with so many different types of people.

I think Communication played an imperative role in my healing process.

I remember that after seven years of not having Communication with other people at the age of 20, I was hungry for Communicating with the outside of myself.

My curiosity about experiencing the outer world was way beyond my fears, and my lack of communication skills.

My curiosity caused me to be open to receive so many different ideas and many contradicted beliefs because I wanted to explore the outer world and find my world.

I can say without those communications; I was not here that I am now.

The more I went into relationships, the more I realized the importance of my communication skills.

I needed to learn and practice it.

At first, I was so sensitive to critics.

And sensitivity to criticism led me to feel not to be understood, and feeling lonely and made me cry from it.

Also, I was so defensive while encountering the opposite idea of me.

That made me don’t communicate well, and I always carried a feeling of being separated.

Eventually, I admitted that I have a lack of effective communication skills.

It led me to make some effective changes and practice some life-changing skills that brought fulfillment for me and filled some part of my emptiness, and I’m still working on it.

Now I can say the problem was ME, that I couldn’t express my emotions well to be understood.

Now I can communicate better, send, and receive communication energy, and this energy made my stuck energy flow.

Now I feel I am in flow state way more than before because of changing Communication with MYSELF, in result with other people.

Effective Communication helps your inner energy flow, and when you are in a flow state, you receive new ideas and more opportunities that are aligned with what you need for your next step, and you feel fulfillment.

8 effective communications:

So, I want to share these 8 effective communications with you that were life-changing and made me calmer because I didn’t need to search for peace somewhere else.

1. There is no Axis for you to defend it:

I heard it from Krishna Mortie that we all make an Axis(Ego) in our mind, and try to feed it and do whatever to protect it because we consider it as our IDENTITY, and when we feel this Axis is at threat, we react as if our survival is at risk.

That’s why we fight with each other to convince other people that we are right, and we are afraid of being criticized so much, whereas we are not aware that Axis is just an illusion and is made by our mind in our head.

Whenever I find myself in a proof and denial situation in Communication, I remember that I am defending an illusional identity, and that is just a waste of time.

2. Thre is no right or wrong:

Here I use Rumi’s metaphor:

If an Elephant were the truth, each one of us would explain about a part of an Elephant.

Tima Mir- secrets of effective communication
Tima Mir- secrets of effective communication

The Elephant is not what we are explaining, but each of us is speaking about one part of the Elephant, which is the truth.

This is a very deep topic that I think reminding it can bring awareness to us to make Effective Communication.

So, each one of us can be true.

In my opinion, most of our issues in Communication is that we believe in right or wrong.

When I joined SFM, it was hard for me to hear from my mentors that there is no right or wrong when I ask them for right or wrong because I was addicted to thinking in this way of distinguishing right or wrong, then I experienced a feeling of emptiness.

The illusion of becoming the first was what my Ego was feeding with, and with no right or wrong idea, my Ego felt a threat.

It made me more responsible because I should make decisions beyond right or wrong and be more effective.

When there is not any right or wrong, you won’t be compared with anybody.

So, what remains is your quality, that would be achieved by experiencing and taking actions, trial, and errors.

Also, I learned that Belief is a way to simplify the complicated world.

So, there is not the right or wrong way in the simplifying the complicated world.

3. Looking at eyes:

Tima Mir-looking at eyes for effective communication
Tima Mir-looking at eyes for effective communication

I found this after my Darkroom retreat, and now I am an EYES LOVER :).

I love to find some eyes to look at.

It makes me free of mind.

It let both the sender and receiver the message to be free of their Egoistic state and help them to communicate in an effective way.

It helps me to be calmer and get out of the restless faze during Communication.

4. Listening:

Listening is what I need more practice yet.

When we are in Autopilot state of the subconscious mind, we just want to say what we want automatically, and don’t pay attention to the person’s readiness or willingness to hear our message.

Imagine when each side focuses on what he/she wants to say and try to talk from his/her point of view, most probable, their Communication turns into an argument. 

Mostly we speak through our illusional Axis and the pressure of saying something to defend it.

Of course, in this way, we won’t be understood or heard as well, and as a result, the emptiness and unfulfillment feeling would be what we get from that Communication.

When I started practicing listening and paying attention to the other’s intention of speaking, whatever it is, it made me create more effective Communication and got fulfillment feeling more.

5. Breath when you are listening:

Tima Mir-Secrets of Effective Communication
Tima Mir-Secrets of Effective Communication

Breathing when you are listening helps you to be calmer and be more patient and get rid of the pressure of “I want to say this or that.”

Therefore it boosts your LISTENING and lets you dive into the flow state.

6. Empathy:

Everyone has a point of view that is speaking based on that point.

So, Empathizing or understanding from which point of view he/she is speaking can boost the flow of Communication energy.

Acknowledge the other person’s feelings for effective Communication.

7. Clarity:

I can remember how terrible I felt when I carried the feeling of not being understood in Communications for many years.

And when I realized that my feelings were not even clear to me to express them clearly to be understood, it resulted in being suffered from it most of my life.

And when I started to make my feeling clear to my self and then express them in a specific and clear way, that changed my negative feelings totally.

8. Change the way you see yourself to make more effective Communication:

Tima Mir-Secrets of effective Communication
Tima Mir-Secrets of effective Communication

“How you see yourself is communicating in everything that you do, everything.”__Justi Woolf ( My mentor in SFM)

You may have had the same experience that when you see yourself confident, then you behave confidently, and they would communicate as if they are communicating with a confident person.

So, you communicate with other people in a way how you communicate with YOURSELF.

How do you see YOURSELF?

You may have noticed that your self-image is like a veil between you and who you are speaking with.

To me, getting rid of that veil was like a new world and made effective Communications; it made me see reality more clearly, NOTHINGNESS, amazing state of mind.

I wish you improved and Effective Communication!:)



Let your second nature go, let it flow, let your real nature come from the unknown with Go Beyond Known JOURNEY.

Put down stories in your head you have been carrying for too long.

Don’t sacrifice your interests to have a good life in the new Age anymore.

Can’t wait to read your comments.:)

If you like this blog series, share with your friends:).

Tima Mir

By Tima

Kind regards

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6 Responses to “8 Secrets of Effective Communication:

  • Dennis Meyer
    11 months ago

    Our EGO, stands for Easing God Out Instead of looking inward toward ourselves we need to look outward toward others. Communication is big part of our relationship with others. You point a lot of problems that individuals have with each other and how to correct them. 👍

    • Oh, that good information about EGO. Yeah, Communication is not just with people that we are in a relationship, we are communicating every moment whatever we do. Thank you for sharing Dennis.
      I wish you great communication.
      I always love to from my readers.:)

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